Thursday, July 17, 2008

Heavens to Betsy

It all started the day mom left for Girl's Camp. Between "morning briefings" with the General and my very stressful life (including laying out, reading, listening to music, and contemplating life's unanswered questions) I was almost at breaking point.
Dad called me into the living room, and as we all know-that's where we get all of his talks. He asked me if i would like to go to a military thing with him the following day. I answered with absolutely no hesitation, "no." And then came the conditions-i would go with him or i wouldn't go anywhere the entire weekend. Again no hesitation, "sure dad it sounds like a lot of fun." the cold hard truth had sunk in. I was not even trusted to stay along at my own home for two consecutive hours. The trip started with much trepidation and zero hope. The first meeting went by fine, standard military precedure. Then i got a taste of dad's famous humor. He introduced me to several military buddies as his wife-as he had recently joined the FLDS church. I think pure mortification made my mouth hang open as i sputtered out, "i'm his daughter. Dad that is not funny!" this happened not once, but twice. TWICE. The next meeting was a retirement and is like nothing i have ever experienced before, nor do i believe i will ever get the opportunity to again. The man retiring (keep in mind he has got to be in his 50s or 60s) was strapped to a gurney and the military men around him preceded to spray him down with a firehose! Dad taking the first shot. Apparently the man being sprayed had had this done to another retiring fellow several years ago. The suddenly interesting slash actually fun trip to the base ended with dad yelling at every single driver on the way home using phrases such as "heavens to betsy" and "idiot". I just sat back and reveled, happy to have this man in my life.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Best Mom Ever.

i just feel like the world should know that Brooke Harrison has the greatest mom to ever grace this earth. She puts up with my snotty attitude and makes me laugh every day. When did she get so funny? I don't ever remember this being the case: This morning I was eating my butterscotch pudding (prepared by none other than the woman herself) and she says to me, "I think this is the best pudding I've ever made! Do you know what makes it so good?" I replied, "I donno mom. Is it made with love?" and she gives her little girlish giggle, "well yes, but i made it with skim milk!" This is where i become completely confused. How could skim milk make anything better?! and she adds "and then i put a little half and half in! Thickest, creamiest pudding ever!" ha so much for being healthy. I continue eating the fat filled delicacy, and mom strides into the room hands in the air, "did no one notice that i am wearing the same clothes as yesterday?!" (keep in mind that i arose from my darkened room about ten minutes earlier, and it is now 9:15 in the morning.) i just laughed and asked her, "when did you get so funny?" to which she retorts, "oh please!" (which she got from me by the way, i say it constantly.) and i say "i think you gleaned it from your children as they matured!" she scoffs, "they gleaned it from me! sometimes i think mothers are invisible to children from the mouth down." and then promptly covers her mouth and discontinues talking. (see picture above) i ran to the camera and chortled i have to blog this! her mouth immediately becomes uncovered and she says in a sweet pleading voice, "can't we just have a private blog, Brooke? one that you write and i am the only one allowed to read?" obviously i won that argument.
and yesterday! we're watching pride and prejudice, (watching romantic films has become a daily occurrence with me.) and mother, pretending to cry and talking in her best British accent ever precedes to wrap her body around me and cry out "you are so much more romantic than I'll ever be!"
and in the car i vividly remember her saying, "oh no. Trent is going to FREAK."

Monday, July 7, 2008

My Life As A Summer Bum

Being grounded and all, i spent a lot of my time around the house. If i can't find things to fill my time, i sleep, which results in mom giving me an earlier bedtime. So not only am i grounded, but i have to be in my room with all electronics off at 11. Not the best living circumstances. So here are some things I've come up with doing:
-Jumping on the tramp
-Reading (currently Les Miserables)
-Movies-which involves dragging mom to the dollar theater
and subsequently making her pay.
-Drinking large quantities of water (a new addiction with me. a
liter and a half a day!)
-Listening to/buying music for my iPod, Bernie.
-Sunbathing-happening less frequently seeing as mother likes
to tap on the window and mouth to me "skin cancer"

All in all, I'm pretty proud of my list. At least I'm keeping (somewhat) busy. The Parents have another idea. Always trying to get me to get dressed in the morning and what not. Mom is constantly telling me that service would make me feel good, and give me blessings so i should go out and do it! I tell her i do do service, did i not just move my feet so Trent could sit down and watch the tube with me? Another common reply is momma, i do have others best interests in mind! It's not my fault that their best interests happen to be my best interests. (As far as I can tell.)
Being grounded is the life.

Friday, July 4, 2008

new hair.

I cut my hair a few months ago, but i haven't taken very many pictures since. Here is one of the few!
I got the cut from Agnes Dean, a British model. It's very short but i LOVE it.

Working on my ECO problem

Recently i was deemed untrustworthy by my parents and hauled off to counseling...again. Now, my story is i don't need counseling and i'm sticking to it. But while I'm in it, i decided why not blog about it? My counselor's name is Chris and as much as it hurts me to say it, i like him. He is a great guy! But there is one problem...he's caught on to my manipulating power-which is more than i can say for the last "counselor"-and instead of seeing me the way i would like to have portrayed myself, i was bestowed with the title, emotionally closed off. (At this point i crossed my arms in frustration attempting to show some emotion, and was promptly told-anger is a secondary emotion, Brooke. We use it to cover up what we are really feeling. So much for manipulation!) Now i can't say anything to him without him thinking I'm making it up. So i was sent out into the world by my counselor to find someone i can open up to. This is me working on my ECO problem.