Tuesday, March 9, 2010

when you gotta go, you gotta go

i was at the DMV today, taking my driver's ed test (the second time, don't worry, i passed -phew-) and I really had to go to the bathroom. This actually happens quite frequently, i drink a lot of water? so... anyway, i paused my test taking hustled to the front and asked the man at the counter if they had a public restroom i could utilize. ( i did NOT say it like that, geez louise) he informed me no, i said, oh alright i'll just hold it. (now i did say it like that) and it must have been the dejected look on my face, or the slight slump of my shoulders, but something made this man change his mind. He said brooke, here's what you have to do, and spit out a whole slough of directions of how to get to the bathroom which i can't even reiterate here, because i zoned out about one/eighth of the way through. i declined and went back to my station to triumphantly pass my test (82%!) and then leave the DMV. I really had to go so i stopped at the nearest hi-rise, and asked if i could use the bathroom there. the concierge looked down her ridiculously long nose (it must have been an optical illusion because i looked back later and it was normal-sized) and asked if i was seeing someone in the building. no, no, no, nothing like that ma'm. she pointed me in the direction of the fedex down the street, which i potty-danced to. It was getting closer, I couldn't find the door, i was practically holding myself in with my own hand, i got the door open, i was teetering in with legs crossed, and looked around desperately for the bathroom, the door had a lock on it, i wondered if i would need to go ask for a key, i was getting frantic, i look up, there was a fedex ad right, there. it read, "we know how you feel"
really fedex? i'd like to claim false advertising.